Yesterday one of the wrestlers was trying to get me to go with them for guys night, on Valentine's Day. He was listing all of the reasons I should go, after I reminded him I have a wife I was spending the evening with. I held up my left hand showing him my ring, and he made a motion with his hands telling me all I had to do was slip it off. Then he made the comment, "Just because you're on a diet, it doesn't mean you can't look at the menu."
That's the thinking in America today. It's ok to look, so long as you don't physically do something. It's ok to think so long as you don't act it out. Jesus said in Matthew 5.27-28, "You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Job 31.1 says, "I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin?"
On August 20, 2011 at around 6:30 pm I entered into a covenant relationship. I stood with my wife before God, my mentor, our friends and family, and committed myself to her until death. We took vows, "...from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part..." As a sign of our covenant we exchanged rings, a symbol telling the rest of the world that we belong to each other. But the ring is just a symbol. The ring does not make me married when I wear it. If I take it off I'm not unmarried. Even if it's lost or destroyed, I'm still married to my wife.
Before we made our vows I was asked this, "Will you have this woman to be your wedded wife, to live together after God's holy ordinance in the state of matrimony? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health; and forsaking all others keep yourself only unto her, so long as you both shall live?" I said "I will." At that moment I was committed, before God, to her. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. At that moment I had told God, my wife, and everyone there, that in every way I belonged to her.
My wife is the only one I desire. She is the only one I want to desire. I love her more than anyone else, and because of that I chose to enter the covenant of marriage with her alone. In the Old Testament covenants were a very serious thing, and were taken much more seriously than they are now. To seal a covenant an animal was killed and cut in two pieces (down the middle, right side and left side). The halves of the animal were laid on the ground and the parties making the covenant would walk between them. It was a statement that if either of them broke the agreement of the covenant that they would be cut in two just as the animal had been. To break a covenant meant death.
The seriousness of a covenant hasn't changed, but our commitment to them has. We live in a society where people have the mindset that I have mentioned at the beginning. The mindset where if I just slip of my wedding ring and no one knows it's ok. As I've been reading The Way of the Wild Heart, it talks a lot about how we are a society full of uninitiated men. We live in a world with men who are men by age, but still boys by maturity. When a society is full of men like that, we have these sort of problems.
We need men to be men. Men who refuse to be selfish and who are committed to the covenants they make. Men who keep their word and live for God, not themselves. Our society isn't going to fix itself. It's going to take real men who are willing to stand up and take it back.
To the men who read this and are willing to be those men, I encourage you to read Wild at Heart and The Way of the Wild Heart by John Eldredge. These are two books that examine who we are, how we've gotten to the state we're in, and how God can bring us back to where He created us to be. They are easy reads that will keep your attention. As you do I encourage you to read through the Bible, looking for who God is. Start in Genesis and read through asking God to show you His heart as you study the pages of Scripture. In Jeremiah 29.13 God says, "You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart." God wants us to know Him, and if we are willing to seek Him, He will show us who He is. Record your findings (note, there are some chapters where it isn't obvious, but God is there). Pray that God will help you become more like Him.
When you get done with that, read it again, this time looking at the men of Scripture. Look for their strengths and weaknesses. Look for the successes and failures. Again, record what you find. Pray that the good things will be part of who you are, and that the negatives will have no part in your life. This will take time and effort, but it is worth it. Life isn't about God making it easy for us. It's about us becoming the men God created us to be in order that we may give glory to Him. Finally, find a mentor, and be a mentor. Find a man who is a man, and ask him to walk through life with you, to pray for you, and help you understand who God is and who He made you to be. Find someone to mentor when the time is right, be a mentor. Find a younger man and help him become the man God created him to be. Share your story, your journey, and how God is working in your life.
Let us be the men God has called us to be.
Peace be with you
No comments:
Post a Comment