Killing Time

I've thought about that phrase a lot in the last fifteen hours. My wife and I went to meet a pastor friend yesterday afternoon, and Tuesday night is our date night, so rather than driving back to come back later that evening we just stayed in the area. We go out to Robek's for smoothies, but at the time neither of us was hungry. And so to save money on gas, we walked around the mall, just killing time.

Now I was spending time with my wife, so I wasn't really wasting time. It was time spent just being together, and talking about thoughts and dreams for the future. It wasn't wasted time because we were deepening our relationship and strengthening our marriage. But I used the phrase killing time as we walked. And then it hit me, what right do I have just to kill time?

I've used that phrase a lot in my twenty-five years, but until yesterday I had never given it any thought. I've finally figured out how to read books in the midst of all the busyness of life, and my goal is to read two books a month. Monday I started reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan, chapter 2 of the book is entitled, "You Might Not Finish this Chapter." It talks about how we could die at any moment. He quotes Frederick Buchner, "Intellectually we all know that we will die, but we do not really know it in the sense that the knowledge becomes a part of us. We do not really know it in the sense of living as though it were true. On the contrary, we tend to live as though our lives would go on forever." When we just kill time, that's exactly the attitude we have.

Life really is short. Already I'm twenty-five, a quarter of a century old. Taking the current average life expectancy of a United States male, 75.6 years, one third of my life is over. Without even thinking about it a significant chunk of my life has passed. And how much of that time have I killed?

As I've been a senior pastor for almost a year, some of my thoughts on church have been refined. Many of my thoughts about God have been changed due to new realizations and revelations found in Scripture. Ultimately I've come to see that my life has been given to me so that I can glorify God. Your life has been given to you so that you can glorify God. All of our lives are meant to come together as The Church, as we work together to build the Kingdom and glorify God. And how many of us fail to do that by killing time?

Time is short, and I don't want to waste any more of it doing things that don't matter. I want all that I do to give glory to God and help build the Kingdom. Jesus said in John 9.4, "We must work the works of Him who sent Me as long as it is day; night is coming when no one can work." Day refers to our lives, while we are alive, ALL of us are called to do the work of God. Night is the time for resting. One of the euphemisms for dying is, "Entered into rest", but I think that's exactly it. When the servants of Christ die, they are welcomed into His presence. Jesus told the thief on the cross who called out to Him for forgiveness, that he would be with Him in Paradise (Luke 23.42-43). The faithful servant of Christ will be given rest. While it is day, let us work faithfully for the Kingdom.

God, I do not want to waste another precious moment of life. I want to live each moment to the fullest; as Paul said in Philippians 3, "I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." Father forgive me for the time I have killed, the moments for service and growing into Christlikeness that I have let slip away. Help me to have the discipline to seize each moment and live fully for your glory.

To God alone be the glory!

Peace be with you