Breathe

For the last few days I've had trouble breathing. I've had a pain on the right side of my body every time I take a deeper breath. It's been constant since Saturday evening. Last night I hardly slept due to the pain, and my gasping breaths kept my wife up all night. Out of concern she made me go to the doctor today.

After he poked different parts of my torso and listened to my breathing and heart beat he came to the conclusion that there is inflammation around my ribs. Not sure how that has happened since wrestling season is over, and I'm not doing any heavy weight training right now. But that's his assessment, and he's been my doctor for 25 years, so I'm pretty sure he's right.

The last few days have been rough because of this. I haven't been able to take a deep breath without being in pain. Yawning, coughing, and laughing all hurt. At times bending to pick something up is very uncomfortable. Over the last few days I have really missed just being able to breathe. And I realized how much I have taken it for granted. I've done it every day of my life for the past 25 years without giving it a thought, until now. I'm painfully aware of almost every breath I take right now, and according to my doctor will be for the next few days. It's been a struggle to breathe, it's been even worse when I've had to do something physically demanding. Catching my breath has been almost impossible. It's been miserable just to do something I do automatically without thinking about it, something I have to do to stay alive.

Good Friday is coming up in about a week and a half. On that day we remember the death of Christ on the cross. Crucifixion is death by suffocation. In order to breath you have to pull up with your arms that have been stretched out and nailed to a beam, and push up with your feet that have been nailed to a pole. Aside from His beating, the crown of thorns beaten onto His head, and the nails driven through His feet and hands, Christ suffered agony each time He took a breath. And for six hours He hung there, taking the punishment of my sins and yours. Pulling Himself up for another breath as His shoulders ached for relief, He took our punishment. Christ was painfully aware of every breath He took.

I remember being in Jerusalem at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, the traditional place of the crucifixion. There is an altar built over the rock that is believed by many to be where Christ was crucified. Under the altar there is a hole cut that you can reach down and touch the rock. We got there early, before any other group was there, but as our group approached the place hundreds of people began to arrive. We were told to hurry and not kneel for too long. I had planned to pray there for a few seconds, wasn't sure what I would say, but when my turn came and I knelt, all I could do was breathe and say a simply, "Thank you."

Breathing isn't something we think about until our ability to do it has been hindered. But each breath we take is a gift. Each breath is life to be lived. Each breath is a chance to praise God. Casting Crowns has a song that begins, "If all I had was one last breath I'd spend it just to sing You praise, just to say Your name." Jesus, for the last six hours of His earthly life, took each breath in agony to set us free. The very least we can do is use all of ours to sing Him praise. The greatest use of our lives is praising God. I've talked before about how God must be praised, how God is the only one worthy of praise, and He has given us breath so that we can praise Him.

In Genesis 2.7 it says, "Then the LORD God formed man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being." There is a Jewish thought that Rob Bell talks about in Nooma video 14, Breathe, which says that breathing is saying the name of God. When we breathe, when we say the name of God we have life, and when we no longer can say His name we no longer have life.

God has given us breath, He has given us life, He has given us the ability to praise Him. It's an incredible thing, I just wish it hadn't taken me the difficulty and pain I've experienced these last few days to really think about it this way. Let us use each breath to praise God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.

To God alone be the glory!

Peace be with you