Over the last week I've had a lot of down time. I'm working on a paper for a class I'm taking, spending a lot of time with Janey, and getting to see Mandi and Ryan, Terry, Jenny and the kids, Zach and Whit, and some other people from school. It's been good.
The restlessness is really starting to get to me, I have to get into a church where I can serve full time, where I can get behind a vision and work towards helping it become a reality.
I've spent a lot of time driving over the last week, and I've gotten to listen to three cds several times, Matthew West, Aaron Shust, and Robin Mark, and a lot of the songs are really incredible. The depth and simplicity, the truth and encouragement, the brutal honesty.
I look at the biggest blessing I ever could have asked for, Janey. I've loved her for four and a half years, honestly since the day I met her. Looking at how God had this planned all along, it's just incredible. I look at her, hold her hand, look through pictures, and I can't believe I get to be with her.
I look at the lack of continuity in my life right now, there is no routine, no structure, honestly, nothing really worth while. Part of me wonders what the point is, what am I doing, how much longer, why?
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