Grieve

As I've talked about a lot this month, today is the five year anniversary of the death of my good friend Linda Russe. Less than a week ago I performed my first funeral, and it impacted me in a way that no other death has. For the first time I was deeply involved in the death of someone that wasn't extremely close to. I had known the man for nine months, and for more than a third of that time he was unable to be at church.

I spent time with him, ministered to him, talked with him about death, dying, and heaven. But I didn't develop the deep relationship that I had with Linda. The family members are now the ones who need the focus. They are in a process of grieving now, and life will not ever be the same. There is pain and sadness, it might be there for a long time, and that's ok, but it can heal. Part of they key to healing is to grieve.

Crying is ok, totally breaking down is ok. Being angry is ok, asking questions is ok. Being alone is ok, but you can't stay isolated. Part of healing comes in sharing the good memories of the person, talking about who they were and what they taught you. Laughing with others about the good times you celebrated with them brings healing, so we must not stay isolated in our grief. Prayer is an important part of grieving and healing. When Linda was diagnosed with cancer countless people were in prayer for her. One of the things I didn't understand was why God didn't answer them. I asked Him why many times, and He finally showed me that there was a lesson for me to learn. I think learning is part of grieving, seeing how God is good, and how all things work for His glory.

Through experiencing the death of someone close to me, I experienced death in a real way, and was able to walk with this family through this time a little better. I don't know what they are feeling, because I haven't experienced the death of a father, or grandfather yet, but I have experienced death. I have experienced grief, and I've come through it and been healed. Life is not the same, and I it never will be, but I am still alive. Because I have grieved, I have been healed, and I am able to continue living. The danger we face in not grieving is being swallowed up by it.

We must grieve, and know that you do not grieve alone. Jesus wept. In John 11, He knew what He was about to do, but He took the time to grieve with the sisters of Lazarus. He knew that Lazarus would live again, but He saw the need of Mary and Martha and met them there. Jesus sees your need, and He will meet you there. He will grieve with you, death is something He knows about. And He will bring healing in time.

Peace be with you